A Checklist to Get You Started
Just over a year and a half ago, I shared with you a reminder of how quickly life can throw a curveball or two. You can read that here if you want to go back down memory lane for a moment. In the past 30 days or so, multiple reminders have come my way, and I thought it was time to bring you along for this ride.
We can start with the most obvious: last week was the 25th anniversary of 9/11, a day when life surely changed in an instant for so many. In an article in the New York Times, the Special Master of the compensation fund, Kenneth Feinberg, talked about how the work changed his view on life, plans, and how quickly things can change.
Mr. Feinberg mentions hearing people express their plans for the future and said, “I listen and nod and smile, and I wonder whether any of this will come to pass,” Mr. Feinberg says. “Where is it written that life will be so accommodating?”
It is not written that life will be so accommodating, nor are there signposts to tell us of any number of dangers just ahead. Hell, even when there are signs to warn us of danger, we tend to ignore them or believe they aren’t directed to us personally. More than once, people—both my clients and general folks I overhear or know—will say aloud, “I don’t need to do that—fill in the blank here—because nothing is going to happen to me.” Until it does.
Whatever it is that “happens” doesn’t have to be on the scale of a mass terrorist attack, but it is going to be pretty awful regardless of what it is. Eat food contaminated with something horrid, fall off an electric bike on vacation, experience an unusual side effect from a medication, get delayed by travel that keeps you out of your house for an additional week, and you’ll quickly discover, if you haven’t already, how much we don’t plan for emergencies.
I’m big on planning for retirement and designing the life you want to lead in the now; that also comes with an awareness of just how quickly we may need to pivot.
Here’s what I mean when I say “pivot”: I’m referring specifically to our ability to be agile and get moving in a new direction, in both a physical and psychological sense. In order to do that, I’m going to suggest you make a nice, tidy, clear space where the bits and pieces of your life are accounted for and the business of the pivot is your only focus.
Some steps you may want to consider in order to tidy up your space:
Write it down. Your passwords, or the master password you use for your keeper; your bank and how your money comes in and goes out (don’t assume you’ll be able to attend to things or that autopay is set up so you’re “good to go”); your passcode for your phone; and important phone numbers for your personal life as well as your professional life. (This list will include your medical providers, your attorney and/or accountant, and your place of employment.)
Get it in writing. This time, we’re talking about your estate planning, your medical wishes, and your directives. “I don’t want…” doesn’t cover it anymore. Be clear. “I want intubation removed after 10 days…” You have choice and agency here; use it to make all of this clear and do it legally. If you have pets, you can also set aside funds and instructions for their care in your estate plans. The written-out-on-lined-school-paper last will of my great-grandmother wouldn’t stand up in court these days, and you should not expect yours to, either.
Let folks know where you keep the keys. Make sure those keys are up to date and labeled. What you don’t want is your loved ones fiddling with the fussy lock or the key that hasn’t worked in 20 years but you forgot to get rid of. This includes your car keys.
Take out the garbage. Literally. It’s no fun to return home 3, 7, or 15 days later to rotting garbage. Take it out each evening after you clean up or each morning on the way to the gym, but take it out.
Put it away. If you’ve got things you’d rather not let random people see, keep them out of sight. If they find them after an emergency that required them to go hunting in your closet, fine. If they find them and you’re gone, well, you’re gone, so it doesn’t have to be discussed.
Factor in your pets. When life goes sideways, it’s not uncommon for pets to get lost in the shuffle. Depending on what the “sideways” was, you might not be able to communicate to anyone that you even have pets. In the animal rescue world, it’s not uncommon to hear about pets who were left unattended due to circumstances beyond their owner’s control or the need for placement when their owner could no longer care for them.
Know your medications. In the event of a life event that limits your capacity to get to the medicine cabinet, it’s good to know what medications you’re taking and the dosing. You can take pictures of the medications or ensure the information is up to date on your phone. (Yes, there are security concerns to having this on your phone, while there are also concerns that you’re not getting what you need because you weren’t sure or didn’t know.)
This list isn’t meant to be the sum of all the pieces that may require your attention, although it’s not a bad start. Please add to it, and feel free to share with me your thoughts about what I missed, as your own life requires.
This list also isn’t meant to scare you. It might have scared me several years ago, but life has done a fine job of leaving me quaking in my shoes without seeking additional drama. You might consider this to be a bit of a pre-flight safety demonstration, minus the person miming the act of blowing up the life preserver.
A little bit of organizing now will pay off down the road, when the realization that change has just shown up as an unexpected guest. You may not be able to control what walks through the door, but you can make it easier to move when it does. And perhaps that’s the real point of all this: not to live as though disaster is always around the corner, but to know that if life asks you to pivot, you’ve already cleared enough space to do it.
